Regarding My Absence

Hine Lake: Photo by Noelle

Hine Lake: Photo by Noelle

I have not been posting much of late and missing many of my friend’s blog posts. I thought I’d share a quick update.

I have made the decision to self-publish my meditation pieces. It occurred to me one day that if I don’t do this I’ll have immense regret. My mother spent a life time writing poetry on the backs of envelopes and dreaming of publishing her work. She never did and it was one of her greatest disappointments at the end of her life. Not too long ago I had one of those crystal moments when I realized if I didn’t do something wild and foolish soon, I’d be lying there thinking the same thing.

In the past two weeks I’ve signed the contract and paid the bill. The book was complete, but after some consultation I am restructuring it before it goes to Lulu.com. I have deadlines I’ve set for myself to have it all completed and submitted before the end of July. Thus, my absence from my own blog as well as many of yours. I plan on being back online in August. Until then I extend you all the happiest of summers or the most joyous of winters for my southern hemisphere friends.

I also give you this: If there are any dreams left in your back pockets, take them out. Lay them out on the table in front of you and ask yourself, “If today was the last day of my life, how would I feel about not having pursued this?” It’s worth asking.

Wish me luck.

Hine Lake: Photo by Noelle

Hine Lake: Photo by Noelle

54 thoughts on “Regarding My Absence

  1. Dear beautiful Noelle … You inspire me deeply , thank you so much, you are exquisite and I know you will be blessed … I will be thinking of you with much positive energy and missing you until you return …all the best beauty to you along your writing and publishing path …hugs and love , megxxx

    • You are another one, Meg, who has set out on her own creative adventure. Funny, now that I think about it, I seem to be circling in the company of many such women. I think would all might be part of a wave. Blessings on your continued journey, too.

  2. I have been missing them, but glad this will be for a super reason! Good for you to take this step. Now is the time!

  3. Wow that is power stuff. You are truly wonderful, and I love you very much. You touch me greatly. I wish you the most gigantic lucky break ever, in terms of finding the right conditions for the success of your book. First you have dared to dream with open eyes, so you are already on your journey… What fun!

    • I know, this actually feels fun. Not nearly as scary as all my other efforts at publishing. And I realized, this is about my fear, not even about financial success. That will be nice, of course, but whether it is or isn’t, challenging this fear is what it is all about. I have been feeling like there is this wall I’m pumping up against regarding the publishing and now I’m ready to scale it and move on. I truly feel like Xena Warrior Princess with my sword drawn and ready to carve a path toward my own free expression. I love you, too!!

  4. Michelangelo was asked of ‘David’ how did you create such beauty. His answer was. “My David was always there, I just kept chipping away”.

    Keep chipping away Noelle.

    I have had the pleasure of seing his work. I am just as excited at the prospect of looking and experiencing yours.

    • Funny, I was just listening to a lecture where they talk about each of us coming from this huge block of marble. Our life is about chipping away at that marble and creating a sculpture. All of us are artist. Love that analogy.

    • You are another wonderful artist whose own work seems to have exploded in creativity in the last year or so. I take inspiration from you, too, into this endeavor. If you create it, put it out there. That has been my lesson from you.

  5. This is very exciting for you Noelle. Congratulations! You write so beautifully. I can’t wait to see the finished product. I am nearly finished my first book and I have a publisher interested too! You have a wonderful gift to share with others and the world. Lots of blessings to you. 🙂

    • Oh I am so excited for you! It’s powerful to put your life on paper, isn’t it? Then to feel that it has a door from which it can leave you and be off on its own life path. Love it. Many blessings, my dear friend. I look forward to yours, too!

    • You Don, have taught me there is no place we think we can’t leave. There is nothing that is home but what is in our hearts. So I leave the old me who was comfy and familiar and unpublished, for someone else. Not wholly sure who she will be yet, but I’m sure like you are discovering this new version of you in the UK, I will enjoy my discoveries, too. Blessings.

  6. Oh how exciting! I dream of publishing my own work one day. Good for you, gosh, I’m so excited for you, Noelle! Hope all goes smoothly to final completion and I wish you the very best of luck, of course! This is a book I would/will most definitely buy, and read over and over and over again, I love your writing. ❤

    • It took me several years to get to the point of being willing to fork up the money to self publish. But I got to thinking how many things I’ve truly wasted money on and how much support I have. Even if I lose money, it will be one of those things I’ll know I did. So think about putting a little money aside here and there. You’d be surprised how it adds up. thanks for the support, my friend.

  7. Go girl Go well done what an inspiration.

    Take Care Be Well

    Gordon Watters 9 Clay St Moorabbin 3189 0457515505

    Sent from Gordon’s iPad 2

    >

  8. I just know it’s going to be amazing. Good luck my dear friend and looking forward to your return already. Oh, and don’t forget to allow yourself time to enjoy those special summer moments that only come round once a year as well as pushing yourself to meet your deadlines. With love.

    • And although I can no longer find the post, I wanted to thank you for the beautiful quote you shared with me of Marianne Williamson. I loved it and have meditated on it often since then. I am ready to embrace greatness and step into more of my light. Your book is surely one of the ways in which you are doing so. I look forward to reading it very much.

      • My ideal will be when I ‘get to work’ and that equals one of the most perfect ways in which I can enjoy my evening… Whether it is just a utopian fantasy or not is yet to be seen.

  9. My best wishes for you Noelle, knowing your talent in writing, I am sure it will be a great read! Looking forward for to hear more about your book as the things completed 🙂

  10. Oof, I’m so tardy to this party. Best of luck to you Noelle, I think you’re doing the right thing and wish you luck on this endeavor! We look forward to hearing how things go and having you back in August. Try to enjoy your summer.

    Thanks for sharing this thought: “If today was the last day of my life, how would I feel about not having pursued x?” This is a fantastic daily meditation (toward productivity, not recklessness of course!). Thank you for sharing and even in your absence, teaching us. 🙂

    • My mother had so many regrets. It has always stayed with me. She never lived the life she wanted. I remember her speaking of the King Tut exhibit she’d meant to see and Ireland she never traveled to and so forth. It’s a terrible way to live, feeling as if there is this entire world inside of you that you never live and no one ever sees. So yes, that is the perfect daily meditation. We should all be living, at least to some degree, as though we were about to die tomorrow. In truth, some of us will.

    • You might laugh, but I have had a number of friends, as well as, bloggers like you who have taken some really big leaps this year. One has left her life to paint, another is backpacking across Australia. You have decided to run for office. I feel like I’m circling in a group of women who are no longer living on the periphery of their talents but have waded into the middle of themselves to see what they find. It takes courage to re-invent yourself and all of you have inspired me to find my gumption and step in, too. So thank you.

      • How lovely to think that my experience has had even a teeny part to play in yours! Can’t wait to get the details about buying your book.
        By the way, I’m sharing your last paragraph (with all due credit) on my FB page. I love your encouragement to just get out there and do it!

  11. I am so happy for you. Walk on in love and beauty. Let me know when the book is out. I want a signed copy. Be well, be happy, enjoy every day, every hour, every breath.

    • Thank you, my friend. It has really been fascinating what has happened to me emotionally and psychologically over the past month since signing the contract to do this. I think you will appreciate this as a fellow writer, but it’s like all of this wild energy has been freed up. As if the “not publishing” was this massive wall to a lot of other creative ideas and choices. That as long as I didn’t pursue this a lot of “me” was being held back. Since signing with LuLu I have all these sculptures in my head. I’ve never sculpted in my life and yet I know I can do this. This past weekend I bought some plaster and just played around with it. I can feel something brewing deep in my belly.

      I realize now it doesn’t matter how successful the book is. I needed to break this barrier to open myself up and expand my sense of myself. If the book is a financial success, well great, but even if it isn’t the success it has already been was apparent the moment I walked into Home Depot and bought plaster. I am no longer the same person.

  12. Great that you have made the leap! I never would have taken my leap in 2009- purchasing my first digital camera and really getting back to photography- if it hadn’t been for my now wife saying at the time to take the money and get the camera. So good luck, Noelle. Keep us updated, please.

    • This is so true, my friend. There really is a point you have to invest your money energy if you want to see your creative energy move. I needed to take this risk, myself, with my own money. Do it to believe completely in the endeavor and let go of that fear. So delighted you share this journey with me and absolutely, everyone will know when the book is ready. A thousand blessings, my friend.

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