Poor Man’s Shadow

Life in Concrete: Photo by Noelle

Life in Concrete: Photo by Noelle

She asks what I want. Such a loaded question. No exit. I want, I want many things but purse strings wrap at my knees and I feel myself falling into her question. I look up. She wants to please me. Her love a warm blanket, tattered but whole. That moneyless handbag dangles off her arm and it’s not the elephant in the room, but rather the herd. I don’t know why she’s asking when there is no way to fill my hunger. I want to tell her not to ask me anymore for my insides she can’t fill. Best not to ask and let me gnaw on my own wants as dog bones left on the floor.

Still, she waits and there’s the tension. The longing to be true and answer with my greatest heart’s desire, because her love deserves that much. Yet to answer is to darken her eyes with that poor man’s shadow. He lingers with his empty pockets in the hallway jingling keys to fool you it was money. I hear him louder sometimes than I hear her. Still, she’s waiting.

I want to love her with an answer she can meet, but all my small hopes are used up. I got nothing but big heart yearnings left and I feel like she can see them straight up, though I’ve worked hard to hide them in the wood pile. “What do you want,” she asks now exasperated. I shove my hands in my pockets, “Nothin’, mama. I’m good.”

I see her sorrow and I eat it whole, like her biscuits. It’s all that’s on the table.

Work in progress from “The Writer’s Church” writing group, Boulder, CO. Hosted by Marj Hahne

Sacred Geometry: Photo Poem 10

Sacred Geometry: Photo collage by Noelle

Sacred Geometry: Photo collage by Noelle

What I love about this piece is its a cesspool. I’m sure the people who saw me crawl down to the sewer drain must have thought me mad, but I love the texture of this. Stone against cement, pouring out water that is so stagnant algae has grown upon the surface. Play with it and arrange the shapes and add color and you suddenly have a piece of sacred geometry that is erupting beautifully out of its history of waste, stagnation and eye sore. To me this is the power of photography and images. We can see beauty in what, at first glance was ugliness. Do this in your environment daily and you have developed a very powerful mindfulness practice. You are engaging in a form of meditation. You are freeing yourself from seeing only the rational world and opening yourself to the drive of creation and life itself. Namaste.